Reading Drag Race: ShakesQueer

The Workroom: Shade, Thy Name Is Jasmine

Jasmine woke up on the wrong side of the Masters bedroom because she is coming for Trixie, Pearl, Miss Fame and especially Violet Chacki.

The Mini-Challenge: On RuPaul's Pond

It's all about Ru this week. I mean, it always is, but Mama Ru was feeling her oats this episode, from the moment she rolled into the workroom on a Jazzy.

Friend of Dorothy (Zbornack)

The ladies got in touch with their inner Golden Girl with Ginger Minj putting some senile stank on it.

Miss Fame really adding the "death" to deathdrop.

These Trixies aren't for kids -- or anyone under 65.

Katya -- living proof that you can teach an old whore new tricks.

But unsurprisingly, grand dame Max Charlestoned her way to the top of the heap as one team leader.

While Kennedy dropped down and got her geriatric eagle on as the other.

Though Ru did give a special shout-out to Jasmine's yeast infection.

The Max Factor

Max was having a Norma Desmond moment this week, reminding us all that it's the pictures that got small.

A Pearl By Any Other Name Is Still As Dumb

Yet another acting challenge, yet another disappointment -- namely Pearl, who had nver heard of MacBeth. I'm sorry, but that cunt won't hunt. This isn't a New York Times leastseller we're talking about here. Someone get this girl an actual library card then get her the hell out of my face.

Very Special Moment

Jaydin just couldn't get her life with Romy and Juliet, but team leader Max was there to bring her back from the brink.

The RuVeal:

Wait, is that a pant?

LVB: Least Valuable Bitch

Violet, Violet, Violet. Picked last -- once again -- you'd think she'd be a shoe-in as the "bitch" in MacBitch. At least Kennedy had her full support. But when time came to deliver, Violet and Kennedy's entire unrehearsed team were loosely tucked. Because they were just dropping balls everywhere.

Best Read

Guest judge Mel "Scary Spice" B. summed up Violet's performance perfectly, while also giving her a prime example to aspire to. Meanwhile, even self-proclaimed biggest Drag Race fan of all time Kat Denning was bored to sleep by the lack of MacBitchery.

For a second I thought Ru was going to applaud, but...no.

MVP

Max's team fared much better, with Ginger Minj particularly standing out. Though for her leadership and general flawlessness, Max secured her first victory. First of many, I'm sure.

The Runway -- Category is: Bearded & Beautiful

Max is serving historical references for your nerves.

Kandy Ho, I Fu Manchoose you!

Noted bitch Violet Chachki tried to redeem herself as the most fishy bearded lady since (at least) Kathy Bates in AHS: Freak Show.

While Jasmine hoped this stunner would save her from elimination. It didn't.

Life-Giving Lip-Synch Moment: All the Twirl's a Stage

Kennedy brought out the disco diva twirl early on in the game, though I thought Jasmine might have saved herself with this squat-and-pop -- in a gown and heels no less.

Ru thought differently.

Parting Words

I see that lemonade, among other things, is still rather bitter.

Parting GIFs

Officer Ru wants to see Team Kennedy's driver's licenses.

Kat Denning for permanent guest host.

Kat and Michelle giving Mel B. the side-eye.

More of Michelle's invaluable words of wisdom.

Les Fabian Brathwaite -- A Midsummer NIght's Read.