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Ashlyn Harris Speaks Out on Ali Krieger Divorce, Denies Cheating
Harris took to Instagram to tell her side of the story.
Soccer star Ashlyn Harris has spoken out about her divorce from National Women's Soccer League champion Ali Krieger, denying that she cheated on her ex-wife and responding to what she calls “brutal” and “painful” abuse she’s faced online since the divorce was announced.
“Several weeks ago, a process that had been ongoing privately for some time became public,” Harris wrote in a post she made on Instagram, speaking out for the first time. “Ending a relationship after almost 13 years of friendship, teammate-ship, marriage and co-parenting (many of them good years) is a decision that was not made lightly.”
Harris emphasized that the couple tried therapy and decided to center their children and not announce the divorce until after Krieger’s last game (Krieger retired this month after winning the NWSL championship with Gotham FC). However, a “leak” changed that.
Harris and Krieger were married for four years and adopted two children together, a daughter and a son.
Most of the narrative around the divorce has been centered on Harris cheating on Krieger while they were still together with actress Sophia Bush. Many fans and people in the professional soccer world have accepted this story and have been piling online hate onto Harris because of it. Now, Harris has denied that she cheated.
“Let me be clear: I did not step out on my marriage,” Harris wrote. “I was always faithful in my marriage, if not always totally happy. Like in many partnerships, there was work in therapy and processing done. None of this happened on a whim. We spent the entire summer working to tackle the separation and divorce steps outlined for us by our therapists, lawyers, and our shared agency.”
“The online hate that has happened since has been one of the most personally devastating experiences of my life.” Harris wrote. “Now, I know that it is best practice in the world of online gossip 'not to feed the beast. Don’t respond. Don’t let them see you sweat.' Just hide away until the tabloids and Internet trolls decide to feast on someone else. For weeks, I have tried to take this advice. I have tried to let the fire burn out and what I’ve experienced has devastated my mental health. This has been brutal.”
“Words matter,” she continued. “The cheering on abuse, the people clamoring to encourage me to commit suicide, and the cruel words spoken about my children, and who I am as a mother? Those words matter. Someday my kids are going to be able to read the hate that strangers on the internet wrote, all because those strangers had an unsolicited opinion on my health and happiness? What are we doing here?”
Harris then addressed the women’s soccer community. Many current and former professional players have commented on or liked posts about the divorce that call Harris a cheater, blame her for the split, and paint her as a villain.
"Right now, it feels like the entire community has poured gasoline on me and lit the matches," Harris wrote. "So many of you, including people who stand publicly as anti-bullying advocates, have cheered this on like bloodsport. As though a family in transition is on opposing teams. Like a divorce is a battle, one person stands to win."
Harris said that her priority “is, as it always has been, my kids,” and that her goal is to be a good co-parent with Krieger.
“I share all of this to remind people that bullying anyone about a personal decision, especially when that bullying is rooted in lies, really hurts,” Harris concluded. “I’m hoping that instead of continuous cruelty, you can remember the simple truth that I’m a human being, a mom, and a good person just trying my best. I’d appreciate if you could take a breath and treat me and my family with some humanity.”
Mey Rude is a journalist and cultural critic who has been covering queer news for a decade. The transgender, Latina lesbian lives in Los Angeles with her fiancée.
Mey Rude is a journalist and cultural critic who has been covering queer news for a decade. The transgender, Latina lesbian lives in Los Angeles with her fiancée.
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