In an article entitled "The Bitch America Needs," New York Times contributor Andi Zeisler makes a case for Democratic presidential nominee and certified-fresh bad bitch Hillary Clinton:
For more than 20 years in American politics, Mrs. Clinton has embodied what we might call Classic Bitch. She's perceived as an interloper who challenges or threatens masculinity, entitlement and a status-quo worldview; she's the scandal magnet who can seem as heartless and venal as any old-boy's-club member. Worst of all, she's the woman who accepts that she will be disliked and carries on anyway.
This isn't the first time someone has lauded Clinton for her bitchiness. Former Vanity Fair editor Tina Brown did. The Daily Show's Michelle Wolf did. Emmy-winner RuPaul did. And perhaps most brilliant, Hillary did. Well, a fictitious version of Hillary:
If it seems like I have contempt for the American voter, it's because I do. Frankly, most of you are fucking stupid. Most of you have no goddamn idea what it takes to run a country. I mean god damn, almost half of you think God created the Earth 10,000 years ago!
What the actual fuck????
Look, this is the big leagues. If you think any problem has a tweetable solution, you're just wrong. If you think "border wall" or "muslims = bad" is gonna solve our problems, I don't have time for your shit.
Slay.
Look, I get it. It's perfectly fine not to like Hillary Clinton. She and Bill make Frank and Claire Underwood look like Tim Kaine and whoever his wife is.
Pretty sure this GIF is a direct quote from Hills, herself. Still, one cannot, and should not, ignore the Clintons' role in the prison industrial complex, the Defense of Marriage Act, and Don't Ask, Don't Tell, as well as their shady dealings over the years which continue to haunt them to this day. And if I hear one more thing about her email server, I'm going to start swinging.
So yeah, it's perfectly fine not to like Hillary--but you will respect that bitch.
Homegirl was out on these streets with pneumonia and shit to pay tribute at the 9/11 memorial. She has a long history of going to bat for women, children, and families; a not-so-long history of going to bat for LGBT rights; she's racked up decades of experience as First Lady, U.S. Senator, and Secretary of State. While all those tenures have their fair share or losses and victories, at least she was out there putting in the work.
In short, she knows her shit--so what if you can't trust her? In effect, you can't trust any politician, particularly not one running for President of the United States. It takes some huge metaphorical stones to say, "You know, I'm going to run this goddamn country." It takes ego, tenacity, and a ruthless ambition. And people who are ruthlessly ambitious will cut you soon as look at you. Now, I love me some Barack Obama, but I'm not leaving him alone with my wallet, my phone, and my keys. Because I don't know him.
The question shouldn't be "Can you trust her?", or "Is she likeable?"--it should be, "Can this bitch do the job?" The answer is a resounding, "YAS KWEEN." That being said, I'm not pro-Hillary so much as I'm very anti-The Other Guy. What I am a fan of, however, is a grown woman doing whatever the fuck she wants and, if anything, Hillary Clinton certainly embodies that. But unless you're Beyonce, America hates that.
What's so great about that article from the increasingly shadyNew York Times is how casually it dismisses the importance of women being liked or making people feel comfortable. As if Clinton leaning into her bitch persona is the key to energizing an ambivalent voting populace--to essentially go from "I'm With Her" to "I'M WITH THAT BITCH!"
All in all, America might just not be ready for a bitch president. But dudes have been doing it for over 225 years and they've been fucking up, so why not just give that bitch a chance? Especially since she's probably going to end up running this country one way or another because that's what bad bitches do.
And if we're all going to hell anyway, wouldn't you much rather have a bad bitch leading the charge?--flipping her hair to the firey pits as if to say, "Not today, Satan--we had a deal."
