Researchers Want You to Masturbate More to Fight Prostate Cancer

Take off those cock rings--researchers (who get paid to watch men cum) have concluded that all that edging you've been doing lately is bad for your health and may increase your risk of prostate cancer. According to studies conducted in 2016 and 2003, a frequent, steady stream of semen is your golden ticket to a happier, healthier life.

"Ejaculation frequency is, to some extent, a measure of overall health status in that men at the very low end of ejaculation--zero to three times per month--were more likely to have other [medical problems] and die prematurely from causes other than prostate cancer," explained Jennifer Rider, the lead researcher for the 2016 study.

Her research followed a sample of 32,000 men over a number of years and found that participants in their twenties who ejaculated at least 21 times per month were 19 percent less likely to develop prostate cancer than those who ejaculated seven times per month or less.

The recent data confirms the findings of an earlier study, done in 2003, that compared the cum-frequency of 2,300 men--half of whom had prostate cancer. The men who came five to seven times per week were 36 percent less likely to develop prostate cancer than those who let it all out two or less times per week.

Whether you're balls deep in your annual summer sex binge or riding solo with Pornhub and a box of Kleenex, it's time to take your health into your hands and blow that load.