Brian Sims and Alex Drakos say 'I do,' urge other queer couples to wed before Trump era

When Brian Sims proposed to his (now husband) Alex Drakos in 2023, the plan initially had been to wed in September 2025. But that plan began to unravel in June 2024 following President Biden’s shaky debate with Donald Trump, which left the Democratic Party and the nation grappling with an uncertain vision for the future.

“The day after the debate that went so disastrously for Biden, the two of us sat down and had a really serious discussion around what we were gonna do if Trump won and what it would look like,” says Drakos, a Pfizer employee and U.C.Berkeley graduate. “…We had said, ‘Would we be worried that our marriage would no longer be possible on the timeline that we thought it would be?’”

Drakos is referring to the fear that, under a second Trump administration, many hard-won LGBTQ+ rights like marriage equality could become undone. While they experienced “a lot of hope riding into the election” after Biden made way for Vice President Kamala Harris as the Democratic candidate, Trump’s victory in November forced them to revisit their timeline.

Drakos recalls thinking after Election Day, “We know we want to get married, and it's very doable to get it done before Trump takes office and any expected changes start to occur. So why not do it?” That both of their parents called to express the same sentiment reinforced their conviction.

So do it they did. Officiated by Julian Cyr, an out Massachusetts state senator and friend, the pair wed December 21 in a small ceremony in the Massachusetts State House alongside their parents as witnesses.

Sims — a former member of the Pennsylvania House of Representatives and the current CEO of Agenda PAC, which advocates for LGBTQ+ representation in politics — says they chose the location of the golden-domed state capitol for its historic role in the fight for nationwide marriage equality.

Massachusetts was the first state in the United States to recognize same-sex marriages in 2004. Thus, it pre-dated the 2015 Obergefell SCOTUS ruling recognizing nationwide marriage equality, and it was where the couple felt their marriage would be most protected in the case of this decision’s repeal. There were romantic reasons for the Bay State wedding as well. In 2021 and just a ferry ride away, Sims and Drakos first met during Bear Week at the Provincetown Tea Dance.

Held just days before Christmas, the ceremony itself was “pretty incredible,” shares Drakos. It had snowed in Boston the day before, causing a delay for the flight of Sims’s parents, who arrived two hours before the ceremony. State House employees opened up the balcony for the pair to snap photos with the Boston skyline as a backdrop. They conducted the ceremony there too.

“It was around 10 degrees, so everyone was pretty resilient in coming out there and kind to spend the time,” Drakos says. “Julian pretty quickly [went] through what were beautifully prepared remarks. And then he surprised us by bringing us into sort of an antechamber for the governor's office — and there's a beautiful fireplace, an incredible Christmas tree, there's pictures of women of color who are civil rights icons plastered all throughout the walls there. It was just a wonderful time with our parents, who were there to actually do the witness portion of it. And we're lucky that they were there to do that. And then, we had some champagne all together and went off for a wonderful dinner as well.”

With a laugh, Drakos admits it was the “most champagne I've had in a single day in maybe ever.”

Sims adds, “It was obviously something we felt like we had to do because of the times and things that could change, and we wanted to make sure we had the opportunity. But I will tell you that as soon as it was done, we both recognized that having the intimate moment with our parents was a lot more special than we had maybe even considered that it would be…. It's impossible to sort of think about the arc of history with respect to LGBTQ+ marriage equality and not think about how deeply special it was to have our moms and dads there.”

Sims and Drakos still plan to have a large celebration this September in Connecticut, where Drakos’s parents hail from. “We didn't exchange the vows that we want to give to one another in front of all of our friends and family, and so we'll save it for that [event],” Sims promises.

But the pair also have a message for other unmarried queer couples fearful for the future: Seriously consider taking the plunge now.

“What I recommend for all queer couples is the same [advice] we took ourselves. Currently, while it is not the absolute 100 percent best legal environment for LGBTQ+ people to solidify their relationships and their partnerships, it is significantly better than it is going to be in the future, maybe the near future,” Sims says. “And so right now while we still have the fruits of what so many advocates fought years for, we should avail ourselves of them while we continue to fight to defend them and expand them. But [these] are very treacherous times we're going into, and having the protections of the law…[is] an assurance that I think everyone deserves. And if you're considering that, you should too.”

In addition to marriage, the couple recommends that rainbow families take a serious look at financial matters, including insurance and living wills, as preparation for the future. They should also seriously consider changing careers and moving to states where LGBTQ+ and women’s rights are codified, particularly for families with transgender children, they advise.

And for allies, it’s not enough to send a congratulatory message on social media when queer friends wed, they say. Be cognizant of why they married — and what’s at stake for their future. “Our marriage is worth fighting for, and we hope all of the people that are excited for us and glad for us and congratulate us are also echoing that in their actions — and not just their ethics and their morals and their values but in their actual actions,” Sims says. “Our marriage is under attack and who we are is under attack. And so to support, to congratulate us, and to be grateful that we were able to do this comes with the attendant responsibility of respecting it, protecting it, and fighting for it.”

See more moments of the happy union from photographer Ryan Stranz ahead.