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RuPaul's Drag Race season 12 star Brita Filter went on the Sean L. Show and got candid about harassment from supposed Drag Race fans and her own struggles with substance abuse that combined to lead to near fatal alcohol and cocaine overdose earlier this year.
As often happens with queens of color on the show, Filter faced absurd levels of hate and harassment from Drag Race watchers after appearing on the show. The hate reached a high after she clashed with fellow contestant Aiden Zhane, saying she didn't deserve to still be on the series. Fans immediately considered Filter to be the biggest bully of the season.
Back in August, the New York City performer deactivated her social media, saying she was "getting the help I need so I don't kill myself." Now she is detailing more about what happened.
"I would go onto social media and there would be hundreds and hundreds of messages every single day," Filter told Lyons on the podcast. "It got too much to bear. When someone starts to tell you you should kill yourself or how horrible of a person you are... you can try to brush it off, but it starts to get to you over time."
Filter said that before the show aired, she was excited to reach a wider audience and gain new fans, but every time new people watched the show, she received a new barrage of hate. She said she knew when Drag Race would air in a new country, because each time it did, she'd receive backlash in a new language. It all led to a moment when Filter felt she couldn't take it anymore.
"I tried to hurt myself," she said. "I woke up on the floor in my room... after doing an entire 8 ball of cocaine and drinking an entire bottle of Tito's and taking every drug I had." Thankfully, Filter survived. "I threw up and I was passed out on my floor the next day. And I knew that I had to do something 'cause I was going to hurt myself. And so I had to take a step back," she said.
Thankfully, Filter is now recovering in Hawaii with her family, and getting better every day while focusing on her sobriety. She's also co-chairing Drag Out the Vote, a non-partisan non-profit organization looking to register and educate voters. She'll also return to her Drag Race season 12 family on October 30 for Bring Back My Ghouls, a Halloween special.
Filter knows she's not alone in struggling with mental health and substance abuse right now, and wanted to share her story because of that. "We're all going through it because this pandemic sucks and it's changed our lives so much," she said on the podcast. "I'm happy, well, I'm getting there. I'm healthy, I'm with my family, I'm in beautiful Hawaii and you know I'm grateful that I have this platform where I can make a difference and I can make a change and I can also be that hope for other people."
You can listen to the Sean L. Show on Spotify and Apple Podcasts.
RELATED: 'Drag Race's Widow Von'Du To Take a Break After 'Fandom' Hate
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Mey Rude
Mey Rude is a journalist and cultural critic who has been covering queer news for a decade. The transgender, Latina lesbian lives in Los Angeles with her fiancée.
Mey Rude is a journalist and cultural critic who has been covering queer news for a decade. The transgender, Latina lesbian lives in Los Angeles with her fiancée.